My Kids Pee On A Puppy
We tried potty training this weekend. I got some of those trainer panties that are cloth on the inside and plastic on the outside, because there’s no way in hell I’m going to let them Hannah go without. The child just waits for the opportunity to have a diaper off before her bath, then runs manically into the corner of the bathroom and lets it flow. EVERY TIME SHE CAN. The thought of her on carpet? Nah uh!
So. We have the little potty seat that fits on top of the regular toilet, and I brought out their little step stool. By the end of the day? Hannah had peed through all the little panties, and Morgan was terrified of the potty. Didn’t go so well.
I think Morgan’s afraid of being stuck up there without the ability to touch the floor. The height seems to be the problem for her. So, in the interest of not spending any more money on diapers, I brought them home a puppy.
So, we’ll see how this goes….
See how cute he is? Don’t YOU want to pee on him?
By Sandi | July 26, 2010 | 3 Comments »
Quite Weird Stuff My Kids Say
The girls are at the age when they’ve worked so hard to master language, and by golly, they’re going to start using it!!! However, they don’t always do so correctly. Every kid does this, I know, but it’s also why we spend so much time laughing at our house. Well, one of the reasons….
Just before bedtime:
Morgan: “Daddy, Morgan’s back is sleepy.”
Daddy: “Oh it is?”
Morgan: “Yes, Daddy! See?” (She proceeds to back up to Daddy so he can see her back.)
Daddy: “Oh. Is your head sleepy?”
Morgan: (Her faces shows she realizes where this conversation is headed.) “No! My head’s NOT sleepy! NO!”
At Dinner:
Morgan: “Mommy! Morgan tickle, tickle beans! Tickle, tickle, tickle!”
Mommy: “Ohhhhh…..okay…..?”
Playtime:
Hannah: “Mommy!” (pointing) “Mommy’s boobie!”
Mommy: “Yes, Hannah. Where’s your blocks?”
Hannah: “No!” (pulls up her shirt and points) “Hannah’s boobie!”
Mommy: “Yes, I know. Do you want your blocks?”
Hannah: “No!” (picks up a doll) “Where baby’s boobie go?”
Mommy: “I don’t know, Hannah. Where did it go?”
Hannah: (deep sigh while shaking head) “I don’t know, Mommy. I don’t know.”
I’d throw something in that Captain Stinky has said, but a) he’s grown out of that stage and into the smart-mouthed tweenager stage (unfortunately), and b) he thinks he’s above that sort of thing now. However! He’s going to a British soccer camp this week, and his coach is from London. After spending time with this guy, Captain Stinky keeps walking around saying “quite” all the time. “I’d quite like that, Mom.” “That’s quite unfortunate.” “I quite disagree.” It’s hard not to laugh, but I know if I pointed it out, a) it would stop and I think it’s funny, and b) he’d be “quite” embarrassed.
By Sandi | July 21, 2010 | 1 Comment »
Wilting
After the girls were born, my entire body decided to board up and head south for the winter. It’s extremely frustrating! My boobs, my belly…crap, even the bags under my eyes are drooping! The other day, I stepped out of the shower, and Hannah saw the c-section scar (that is vertical rather than horizontal, so that with the c-section scar I got from Josh’s birth, I have an upside down “T”). She looked at me with all the concern a little girl of 23 months can manage, and said, “Momma? Owie on your tummy, Momma?” I assured her I was fine, but it doesn’t stop her from now looking for it EVERY DAY to kiss my owie. And, unfortunately, since everything hangs down to my knees, she doesn’t have to reach up very far.
By Sandi | July 20, 2010 | 2 Comments »
Heading out on tour?
In the past three weeks, Josh has developed an interest in golf. We went out on July 4th and played 9 holes. He shot a 125. I shot a 51. Not my best showing (it was raining) and Josh only let the club fly out of his hands once.
But, he liked it. So we bought him a set of junior clubs.
So for the past two weekends, we’ve gone to a very simple 2-hour golf lesson program for “juniors” at a local golf course/country club. He did okay the first time, but only lasted about 50 minutes.
He took this past week and practiced in the back yard with the plastic golf balls we had bought a few weeks ago.
Today, he made it through the entire 2 hours. He was spanking the ball 80+ yards off the tee straight out. The golf pro has taken a shine to Josh and said he is amazed at how quickly Josh is improving. Who knows? Maybe you’ll see his name on the leader board in the next 10-15 years.
By David | July 17, 2010 | 1 Comment »
Ambien, How I Miss Thee!
After an apparent two day slump in which I slept for about 3 hours per night (I SOOOOO miss Ambien CR! However, it’s a bad idea when I need to be awake when children are, and that sometimes happens in the middle of the night.), I feel somewhat better. Which may have something weird to do with planning mealtime for my family again. (I think I’ve mentioned that I’m not a planner. I’m NOT, but I AM an organizer. And those skills that are no longer being put to use in a work environment are now being put to use in my home one. I think that’s where the planning part has become a little more possible. And a little more “together” in my life.) (I’m not sure why you all needed to know that.)
I honestly think part of the not sleeping thing is also that when I don’t sleep, I have more time alone. More zen. And the more of that time I spend sleeping, the less zen time I have. Although, the less time I spend sleeping, the more zen I NEED. It’s a vicious cycle.
In other Twin news, Morgan’s read to potty train it looks like, but Hannah? Not so much. How in the heck do I potty train? (Captain Stinky had this wonderful sitter at the time, and I very literally dropped him off one morning, and picked him up in the afternoon and he was trained. She followed me out the door with instructions to set a timer and pee according to schedule and all that, and voila! Potty trained!) NEVER done this with a girl. Thoughts?
By Sandi | July 15, 2010 | 2 Comments »
Car-tiquette
While my kids and I were driving around yesterday, I realized something….
You know how there’s a whole group of people all pissed off about people driving and talking on the phone at the same time? And they all get their panties in a wad about keeping attention on the road when driving, and then the talker/drivers get their panties in a wad about how they are totally coordinated enough to do both, and everyone ends up sitting around in wadded panties while no solution has been soluted?
Or those people who gripe about people who drive while eating, because they MUST be totally distracted and they SHOULD be paying attention to the road with BOTH hands?
Or those other people (like me) who get terrified at the site of someone eating while putting on makeup while reading the newspaper and on the phone and looking at a map in the car?
Yesterday I realized something. The absolute MOST distracting thing of all? Driving with children. Especially when they’re throwing a fit. It’s horrible. There IS NO CONCENTRATING ON DRIVING. There is only insanity at their ridiculous fit/complaining/crying/screaming/stupid argument. Can we start a movement for THAT? CARS WITHOUT KIDS?
By Sandi | July 14, 2010 | Comments Off
Old(er)
David and I were talking the other night before drifting off to sleep, and came to a startling revelation. Turns out, we’re grown ups! And this revelation was even more punctuated by reading old blog posts (from before David and I even knew of each others existence), and I thought “Why in the HELL did I think that stuff was funny??? It’s just stupid!”. Which obviously means my sense of humor has even changed (obviously it NEEDED to).
But along with that, did I seriously need to get the gray strands in my hair? Because I could’ve totally lived without that.
I blame it on my children.
By Sandi | July 13, 2010 | Comments Off
Now Back to Your Regularly Scheduled Programming
When David and I met, we both had blogs. And, as a single-parent, Captain Stinky was my social life. Pathetic, I know, but I was okay with it. I had you, Internet, for venting and sobbing and laughing with, and I had convinced myself I didn’t need anyone else. Fast forward a bit, and David and I met (obviously I’d gotten over the whole “don’t need anyone” idea). A little more of the fast forward button, and we got married. Fast forward another (very little) bit, and we were pregnant. With twins, no less. And settling into a life together that included a very bewildered Captain Stinky and pregnancy, etc. No time for anyone else but us and our families. Then the girls were born. And before they were a year old, we decided to uproot and move the entire kit-and-caboodle to Florida. And now we’re here. And the girls are almost two. And by that, I mean Terrible. Two. Times. Two. Which, of course, means that I’m going crazy and my children are often more annoying than adorable (except for times they’re sleeping, of course), and I spend most of my time saying “NO!” and trying to minimize catastrophe after catastrophe. And it’s exhausting. And most of the time, I end my day wishing night would last longer so I could have a little more time to myself, or with my husband.
So here we are in Florida, and it’s been a year, and I’ve realized something.
I. Am. Lonely.
And, other than our neighbors and a few people David works with, people pretty much scare me here. They are somewhat less than savory, and people I would never trust with my children OR myself. Certainly not BFF-material. People around here give Child Protective Services job security.
David and I have a disconnect in this area, too. I’ve been with children all day, and am so looking forward to adult conversation that I get almost giddy at the idea of him coming home. He, however, has been working all day and talking to lots of people, and just wants to decompress. So he does his thing, and I do mine in the evenings, until we both collapse, wordless in front of the TV. We try and become a couple again on the weekends.
I’ve been lamenting over this problem for weeks. Then, this morning while sitting amongst a huge pile of dirty laundry and sorting, I realized that my fill-in used to be this! Right here! A corner lot on the Internet! A place to vent, to talk things out, and even get the occasional bit of feedback or advice! And I don’t have to make sure anyone else’s house is child-proofed, or work visiting around nap-schedules!
So. I don’t know for sure yet….we’ll see how this goes. But I may be back to writing regularly.
By Sandi | July 12, 2010 | 4 Comments »
Updates on Life
It’s been so long since I’ve written anything here that WordPress has forgotten who I am. Bad sign.
Our daughters are a few months shy of two years old, and they and their brother fill me up every day. While there are days that I feel frustrated and suffocated being a stay-at-home-mom, those are few and far between compared to the days I feel so very lucky to be experiencing something so magical and fantastic as motherhood.
There are things I have learned that make our lives easier. Organization is key to a large family. So is routine, which I have trouble with. I like the ebb and flow of life, and don’t particularly need a “plan” for daily stuff. The girls, however, do. So I’ve adapted, and accommodated. And our lives are much smoother as a result (thankfully!).
And good grief, are they smart! Morgan runs around the house these days pointing out all the circles, and parroting everything anyone says. (Yes, this means David and I both have to watch what we say like never before!) 
Hannah sings and dances, and climbs, and schemes. She’s the tricky one I always have to watch out for.
Josh is trying to figure out his part in all this still. He loves his baby sisters like no big brother I’ve ever seen before (and we’ve put a baby-gate in his bedroom doorway to encourage this love and acceptance of them even further).
This family that David and I have made is my happiness. They fill me up like nothing I ever imagined, and certainly nothing I ever expected. I am amazed that everything has worked out like it has. Yes, of course we have the normal life crap like everybody else, but we have this little army of five that means none of that is nearly so important. Our children are glowingly happy, which makes us glowingly happy. And which makes for terribly boring blogging material.
Except….
Hannah was carrying around her “baby” today, and it pooped. I was informed of this when she started screaming and demanding a diaper.
Morgan saw the neighbor’s terrier out the window while having dinner last night and said, “Look! A mouse!”
And Josh nearly pooped his pants the other day when he was out fishing with David, and found a turtle on the end of his line. A very BIG turtle.
By Sandi | June 22, 2010 | 2 Comments »
Father’s Day, Part Two
I am still unable to put into words the thoughts that I have about my former step-daughters. For more than a decade I watched them grow and become young ladies. From the very first moment Jordan climbed into my lap to last venomous look she game me when they left our house in Chelsea, I have loved all three girls: Amanda, Jordan and Sydney. I can only imagine what kind of young women they have become in the past three and a half years. Amanda just turned 20, Jordan will be 18 in December and Sydney will be 15 next month. Unreal.
I still miss them and wish them all the best in life. Despite all that their mother may have told them, leaving them was the hardest part of our divorce. The very hardest.
By David | June 20, 2010 | Comments Off
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